Hustling Through Space
by genomsyrad
Summary: A VERY MUCH AU STORY   Amelia Pond and Rory Williams Pond are wed and partners in crime. Together they own a small transport vessel - a space ship named 'Petrichor' - which they use to get around the galaxy to trick and gamble their way to the good life.
1. No Vacancy

"Amy! Amy!"  
>"Yeah, yeah, take it easy, Rory-man," shouted Amelia as she half-hopped, half-ran down the stairs to<br>the main deck. "Where's the fire?"  
>She stopped dead in her track as she rounded the corner and saw the far too familiar scene before her.<br>She would not have to wait for an answer.  
>"Well," she said, reaching for her gun to accompany the one already aimed at the stranger. "What have<br>we got here? Looking for a ride, are you?"  
>The intruder - a man looking to be around 30 years of age, dressed in a horribly unfashionable tweed<br>jacket and black dress pants - did not seem to mind the big weapons pointing at his direction. He only  
>smiled and waved slightly.<br>"Oh, hello! I seem to have gotten lost. Apparently this isn-"  
>"He says he got in through the box," said Rory and gestured to the big blue thing that had somehow<br>escaped Amy's attention up until now, which was probably for the better; had that been the first thing  
>she'd noticed, she'd probably have thought she was going mad.<br>"Yeah?" she answered Rory without taking her eyes off the strange man. "What is it? It's looking  
>pretty... garbage-y to me."<br>"Hey! Don't diss the TAR-"  
>"Quiet!" snapped both Amy and Rory in unison.<br>It was a frequently used tactic of theirs, to talk openly about others as if they weren't there. There was  
>something about it that seemed to make the people in question feel unsettled, which, of course, were to<br>the couple's advantage.  
>"Stowaway, huh?" said Amy, now looking at Rory. "When do you think he snuck in?"<br>"No idea. Not on Erytheia, that's a given. Just look at his clothes!"  
>Another tactic. Cue arrogant laughter from them both, and the poor man might just believe them to be<br>as well-read as they sounded.

"So, husband, what d'you think we should do with him?"  
>"Actually, if you just let me get to my box, I'll make sure to-"<br>"Actile is always looking for people to buy, isn't he? This one might not be the kind he's wants, but..."  
>"That's my Rory, always with a plan on hand. Not sure we'd get that much for this one, though-"<br>"Hey, money is money, right?"  
>"Wise words. Besides, I bet Actile could just feed him to the Goliath fish, those ugly bastards are<br>always hungry."  
>"No, no! No fish needed, not enough meat on these bones, I assure-"<br>"I said, shut it!" snapped Amy once again and threateningly held up her weapon, and the man raised  
>both of his hands in the air.<p>

The armed pair threw one angry glare each on him, and then exchanged a long glance between each  
>other.<p>

"So we don't sell him, then," said Rory.  
>"No," answered Amy as she walked up to the man, careful to not lose her aim. "We take him hostage."<br>"Hostage?"  
>"Hostage."<br>"That doesn't work", then said the stranger. "You see, the term 'hostage' implies that you have  
>something to win, some sort of deal to make with someone who want me alive, and seeing as there's-"<br>"Shut up, or I'll shoot you in the head," said Amelia with a stern, harsh voice. The man did as he was  
>told.<p>

"Our ship, our rules," said Amy as she raised her gun to aim between the man's eyes. "You're our  
>hostage. Now, I advice you to do as we say, or I'm guessing something unpleasant might happen."<p> 


	2. Bad Conversation

Amy is furious. Rory can see it from afar; no, scratch that, he knows her well enough to sense her anger, sense the wilderness raging inside of her. Rory knows that while Amy sometimes seems hostile and ruthless, she really isn't. She just wants to understand so badly, and when she doesn't, it really gets her goat. That's what he tells himself, at least.

* * *

><p>The man - who has asked them to call him 'the Doctor' (though <em>what<em> kind of doctor exactly, Rory isn't sure) - refuses to give them anything. He doesn't tell them how he got in,

* * *

><p>why he's here - he won't even give in to tell them how he managed to get the stupid massive mastodon of a phone box on board. Rory's certain the man couldn't possibly have carried it - he himself needed to both ease the gravity check and use the ship lift only to stow it in the storage room. He and Amy have decided to keep in there, locked away, until the Doctor-man talks. If he ever will talk, that is. Maybe they'll just be better off selling him to Actile, who knows?<p>

* * *

><p>So while Amy is trying to deflect her anger in the ship's relaxation room (which really is just a cupboard they've dressed entirely in synthetic wintergreen, but it sure does the job), Rory is stuck with guarding the hostage, or 'the prisoner', as Amy now prefers calling him. He doesn't like it, not one bit; if he was in charge, this 'Doctor' would be kicked out out with his behind first since long. Sell the box, mash it into pieces, do whatever; you board unwelcomed on one's ship, you face the consequences. But Rory won't do that, not even something remotely similar to it - he loves her too much. If she want the Doctor strapped and bound but unharmed until he squeaks, then that's what'll happen.<p>

* * *

><p>"So," says the man as he sits tied to the lanky old chair, looking at Rory who's sitting much more comfortably on his armchair, across the room.<p>

"So," answers Rory with an exaggerated bored voice. He doesn't want conversation, it won't lead anywhere, so what's the point? The plan is to sit still and quiet until Amy comes back. She'll deal with the ugly business.

* * *

><p>"You two are married, huh?" asks the Doctor and grins with what presumably is a 'knowingly friendly' smile. Rory just thinks it makes him look even more stupid than he already does.<p>

"Yup."

"Ah. I could tell."

Rory doesn't bother answering.

"Do you know how I could tell?" asks the Doctor.

"No."

The room feels awfully tense, Rory thinks, but maybe that's just him. They sit quiet for a while. Rory is naïve enough to think that Doctor-man finally took a hint and decided to shut it, but no, that would of course be too easy.

"Do you want to know how I could tell?"

"Honestly, no, no I don't," Rory answers with the most drawling voice he could possibly manage.

"Great!" says the Doctor. "Firstly, it's the looks. You look at her and she looks at you in a special way, the 'married' way, you know? It's wonderful, the gaze between two people who love each other, truly-"

* * *

><p>Rory can't remember an earlier time when he wanted to throw someone overboard as much as he does now. But no, Amy's wish is law and he can do this, he just needs to focus on something else. Suddenly the wall is much more interesting than it was a few minutes ago.<p>

"And then there's the touch," the Doctor continues. "You have these little touches, small, very careful ones, but if you watch closely, they're there." He looks up at Rory with another small smile and Rory feels almost tempted to smile back, because seriously - he though this one was just as daft as he looked, but apparently the case is much, much worse.

"And finally, there's the one main sign," the Doctor says as Rory has just risen from his chair. "The big give away. You want to know what that one is?"

Rory sighs loudly. He's being rude, he knows that, but on the other hand, this man broke into their house. If there's some people you're allowed to be rude against, it must be robbers, right?

"You know each other. You know how the other works. Or more specifically, she knows how you work."

And then all is still.

* * *

><p>"She knows how to work you. How to play you as she likes."<p>

"What do you mean?" Rory asks, and _damn _him, there weren't supposed to be any conversation!

"Oh, I think you know _exactly _what I mean," the Doctor answers with a sly smile. "She's in charge, and that's how it's always been, hasn't it?"

Rory snickers and shakes his head slightly, and he sure hopes he looks more aloof than he feels. This 'doctor' have no idea what he's talking about, not even the slightest bit, but somehow the words sting just a little inside of him.

"Don't take me wrong," says the Doctor, "I'm not saying it is wrong. That's just the way marriages tend to work: one person takes the lead, the other follows. And seeing your reaction to it, she seems to be remarkably good at it. Do you think she even knows it herself?"

* * *

><p>Rory can feel the impatience building up inside of him, mixing with the already existing irritation and creating an unnerving, stirring feeling. He clenches his jaw but that doesn't do it, he feels like he has to kick it, shake it, punch is out. He even considers doing some angry dancing, but no, too humiliating. This isn't good, though. He feels worried by his own state of mind, by how much his feelings are getting stirred.<p>

"Admit it, though," the Doctor continues, "you much recognise this just a bit?"

"Don't you know how to shut up," Rory snaps.

"No."

The Doctor looks amused. He's actually smiling; the bastard is enjoying this, Rory thinks and can barely believe his eyes. What ever happened to the 'friendly' banter?

* * *

><p>"Just look at this whole deal regarding me! You suggest you sell me; a fine plan, makes profit, gets rid of the problem, all that jazz. She doesn't want it; her word goes. Isn't that right, <em>Rory-man<em>?" the Doctor says with a voice nothing similar to the smooth and soft used earlier, and Rory realises that he has made a serious misjudgment of character. The Doctor isn't a daft idealistic man; he's a sly old bastard, a manipulator disguised behind careful smiles and friendly words. And you should never, _ever_trust a manipulator.


	3. Nobody Puts Rory in a Corner

"Amy?"

A small knock was heard from the other side of the door. Amelia sighed softly. She felt a bit disappointed to have her relaxation time interrupted, but she had spent enough minutes inside of the room for it to have given effect. Besides, it wasn't like she could stay in there forever. She had a ship and prospering business to manage.

"Yes?" she answered her husband while still keeping her eyes closed. She tried to focus on taking deep breaths, using the diaphragma, or whatever it was her bogus health advisor had recommended, but it was still difficult.

"Could you come out? We need to talk. It's about... Him."

"Him?"

"You know," said Rory. "The prisoner."

"Oh."

* * *

><p>She had almost forgotten about that one. They had a prisoner - hostage, captive, whatever you'd like to call it. Intruder. She didn't like him.<p>

* * *

><p>"What about him? Has he said anything?"<p>

"Can you come out and talk? Please?"

She thought for a moment, and then rose to unlock the door.

* * *

><p>The difference in air 'twixt the relaxation chamber and the ship corridor hit her in the face as soon as she stepped outside. Maybe it was the worried look on her husband's face, or the noticeably chillier temperature, she wasn't sure, but close to all of her calmness and composure accumulated within the room disappeared instantly. Suddenly she was reminded of just how angry she'd been around one, one and a half hours ago.<p>

* * *

><p>"Okay," she said sourly. "Shoot."<p>

"Well," he began, "this- this guy - the Doctor - he..."

Rory swallowed and went quiet for a few seconds, as if to look for the right words.

"He- I, I just don't like him. I don't like having him on board."

"Okay," said Amelia matter-of-factly. "Neither do I, because he broke into our vessel, presumably to jack our stuff. What's your point?"

"No, Amy," said Rory. "I don't _like _him. He creeps me out."

* * *

><p>Amelia took a close look at her husband, studied his face. She loved him, she truly did, but they differed on so many parts and even if it was hard for her to admit, her patience had dropped significantly much lately. She didn't want to upset him, but sometimes she couldn't help getting upset herself. And when she got upset, Rory usually did, too.<p>

She sighed once again, but loudly this time.

"What did he say?" she asked Rory.

"Why do you think he said anything?"

"One," answered Amelia quickly, "he didn't shut up once while we secured him, and two, you never get 'creeped out' by behaviour, just words."

* * *

><p>It was Rory's time to sigh now, and so he did.<p>

* * *

><p>"He," said Rory, pausing to lick his lips, fumble with his fingers. "He told me that you and I... That you, you," he stuttered. Amy crossed her arms in annoyance.<p>

"That I..?"

"Look, it doesn't matter, all right? I don't like him, you don't like him, and we've got him locked inside the boiler room. Let's do something about it?"

Amelia smirks and takes her husband's hand in her own.

"No one upsets my Mr. Pond without permission. Let's go get him."

"My- my name isn't 'Mr.'- fine," said Rory as they scurried through the ship corridor.


End file.
